Hanoi: Scooters and Tiny Plastic Chairs

Hanoi wins. Hands down. Craziest city we have been to so far. We were intimidated by the scooters and traffic upon arrival in Marrakech.  The tuk-tuks, scooters, and taxis flying around Bangkok didn’t even phase us after that.  But somehow, the Vietnamese managed to take it to a whole new level. The number of scooters is a sight to see, but the lack of actual rules is what sets Hanoi apart. There are no lanes, and the scooters just go wherever they want, including the sidewalks and in the reverse direction of traffic. The majority of intersections have no signs or signals, so it is a free-for-all with scooters, cars, bikes, and ladies pushing carts all crisscrossing in a seemingly orchestrated dance of controlled chaos.

Somehow, it just works here. We have never seen anything like it. To cross the street, we had to follow locals to learn the ropes. After about a week, we were crossing streets like pros. Here is the busy road right outside our AirBnB that we had to cross every day.

So, what is the secret when the parade of scooters never ends? Faith. As long as there are minimal cars around, you just take a step out into scooter traffic and keep walking at a slow steady pace across the street. Magically, the sea of scooters parts around you. My heart races every time I do this, but it works. Fear or stopping in the street is what will get you in trouble (don’t be a squirrel). I also hope someone warns Vietnamese who visit the US. This trick would not work with NYC taxis!!

Scooters are the Vietnamese SUV. They use them for everything from hauling boxes, propane tanks, cases of glass soda bottles, and bags of dirt to delivering fast food and picking the kids up from school. That’s correct. The scooter plays the role of “minivan” too. They have no problem with holding on to kids as they drive down the road. A baby in one arm with the other arm wrapped around the driver is a common sight. A family of four “easily” fits as well with the oldest child standing in front and the smallest child wedged between the parents.

This position must be comfortable, and the scooter noise soothing, as we saw many children completely passed out between their parents, like this little girl.

And don’t forget the family pet.

We were amazed to see how much they can pack onto a scooter and very impressed with their ability to strap it all down. One of our favorite games in Hanoi was “who can spot the most ridiculous scooter load?”

Our top five:

The giant kumquat trees for TET

Ridiculous number of wicker baskets

Giant floral arrangements

Balloons

And the winner…

Jimmy and I were at the gym and both got to watch the ridiculousness unfold. I was upstairs on the spin bike while he was on the elliptical downstairs. We both were watching in disbelief as a man was trying to help a woman tie a large pane of glass to her scooter. They eventually realized that no matter how they tied it, she would not be able to sit down and drive the scooter. So, the solution? He jumped on the back of the scooter and HELD the giant pane of glass straight up in the air between them and off they went. Best of luck to them!

Okay, so I think you have the idea now about the scooters but may want to know a little bit more about life in the capital of Vietnam and what it has been like for us to live here for almost 6 weeks.  Imagine, one minute, you are in your comfy AirBnB analyzing genetic mutations to diagnose rare diseases and then you step outside into the hum and buzz of the scooters and the locals going about their daily routine.  Welcome to Hanoi, where it feels like a big city crashed into a village.

Some of the people and activities that you will see:

Women walking around the streets carrying baskets full of fruits, vegetables, and flowers or pushing carts with everything from china cups to children’s clothing.

Men sitting around on tiny plastic chairs drinking beer, eating sunflower seeds, and smoking. Women in the typical Vietnamese squat position next to a tub of water washing dishes

or working at the scooter wash. (doesn’t have the same ring as car wash, does it?)

Giant fish sprawled out on the sidewalk getting gutted.

Chickens running around about to get their head chopped off.

Or tied to the back of a scooter – still alive (or is it mostly dead?).

Women sitting on tiny stools cooking noodles, ladling out soup, cutting up fruits and vegetables, and opening steaming banana leaves full of sticky rice and pork.

And somehow after living here for a few days, it all seems normal.  On our way to the gym, we wave to the lady at Jimmy’s favorite lunch spot.  We walk straight into the sea of scooters and safely make it to the other side.

The same woman with the basket of bananas tries to hand over her basket saying “photo, photo”.  Does she really not recognize us?  We have seen her multiple times. Do all white people look alike?  Oh wait, Jimmy isn’t white…does she just not care and is messing with us?  We step over people having their breakfast and make mental notes of which food stands we need to come back to.  And have I mentioned yet that scooters rule here…including the sidewalks, which become parking lots. Three deep on our walk to the gym!!

Forcing us to walk in the road with all the craziness. And if the sidewalk isn’t full of scooters, then it is probably covered with tiny little plastic stools and tables filled with people enjoying a meal.

Did you catch my statement about stepping over people eating their breakfast and think this odd?  Tiny plastic stools and tables line the streets as locals sit down to enjoy a quick bowl of Pho before heading to work, so you have a choice of either stepping over them disrupting their meal or walking in the street. So, the street gets even more clogged with pedestrians along with the scooters, cars, bikes, and push carts.

The tiny plastic stools are ubiquitous in Vietnam, and as you see the various scenes described above unfold, you realize how important they are to all aspects of daily life.  At first, we were quite annoyed that the sidewalks were not meant for pedestrians.  But, then when you realize that the sidewalk is where life is lived in Vietnam, you grow to understand and appreciate where Hanoi gets its character.  For us, the best way to experience the culture was to enjoy our meals at the same street food stands as the locals on the tiny plastic chairs.  Seeing Jimmy on a tiny plastic stool always brought a smile to my face.  He isn’t exactly the size of a typical Vietnamese person.

These ladies couldn’t speak English, so we aren’t exactly sure what we ate here. But, it was good!  Some sort of fried dumpling filled with noodles and a mystery meat.  

Here is another spot that we decided to try because it was packed with locals…

and serving a traditional dish called Banh Gio (a rice and pork pyramid stuffed in a banana leaf).

This place didn’t even have tiny plastic tables to go with the tiny plastic chairs.  Everybody was packed in on the little stools and just holding their food and digging in.

Of course, we can’t forget dessert on a little plastic stool.  Although desserts are not much of a thing in Vietnam, we found a street stand that sold an interesting concoction.

A cup of coconut milk with any of these chewy additions that you want: tapioca, rice jelly, coconut jelly, grass jelly, mung bean, longan, or jack fruit.  We pretty much got all of it in our cup and were surprised how deliciously the flavors and textures combined.  Of course, everything in Vietnam tastes better when sitting on a tiny plastic chair.

Due to a shortage of dessert options and being something unique that we may never have again, we made it back to this spot for a second round and this time Jimmy even got serenaded by a little Vietnamese girl.

Lastly, you can’t come to Hanoi and not party in beer corner on a tiny plastic stool.  Beer corner is a popular hang out in Hanoi where the main intersection plus the adjacent streets are full of tiny plastic chairs and people drinking the special, extremely cheap Bia Hoi.  At only 20 cents per glass, Bia Hoi is quite possibly the cheapest beer in the world.  

Although we did not do a good job of picking up many Vietnamese words during our stay here, the word for beer, bia, is quite an easy one.  Also, the popular pho noodle dish helped us quickly learn the words for chicken (ga) and beef (bo).  One day, we were out sightseeing and kept seeing vendors with little white boxes labeled with bo bia. 

We were totally confused!  Jimmy would have been happy with a beer for his snack.  And I’ll roll the dice with a mystery beef.  But, beef beer?  We were intrigued enough to order two and then shocked when we watched the vendor whip out ingredients we did not expect and realized that the Vietnamese language is just too complicated to figure out.  We even made sure the inflection symbols were the same!  Somehow bo bia is a thin rice paper wrap filled with sugar cane, shredded coconut, and sesame seeds.  Strange but actually a perfect little sweet snack!

We couldn’t help ourselves but get one of these whenever we passed by a vendor for the rest of our time in Hanoi. The soft pancake, chewy coconut, and crunchy sugar cane made for a unique textural sensation and a flavor combination that worked perfectly together.  Oddly, it reminded me of a Norwegian snack that my mom makes called lefsa, a potato pancake that we fill with butter and sugar. The other favorite snack food that we had a couple times in Hanoi was banh cuon.  This light dish is often eaten for breakfast but served throughout the day.  Banh cuon is made from a thin steamed fermented rice batter and filled with seasoned ground pork, minced mushrooms, and minced shallots topped with fried onion crisps and served with a fish sauce for dipping.

Here is the lady steaming the delicate rice sheet to make the bahn cuon.

Not all banh cuon are created equal.  This mini restaurant called Banh Cuon Gia Truyen serves some of the best in the city.  I had it elsewhere and was quite disappointed.

After all this eating on tiny little stools, a few of you may be wondering again how we aren’t gaining weight.  Just like in other cities, we were able to find a gym in Hanoi and get a month membership to be able to burn off all these excess calories. I have to give props to the Vietnamese women.  Out of all the countries that we have been to so far, they have been the most hard-core weight lifters that I have seen, except for the fact that they all loved to waste time on these two silly machines.

Aside from these machines, the gym had everything we needed including free weights, a squat rack, and a bench press…

Except that I couldn’t focus because these two were looking down at me over the bench press…judging…

After being stared down by the Rock and Marky Mark, I usually decided to cook a healthier meal at home instead of indulging in the street food.  So, on the way home from the gym, we would buy eggs from the lady on the corner.  And bananas from the guy a street over from her.   Getting food to be able to cook and eat meals at home was a bit of a scavenger hunt in Hanoi.  

For us, this is what our adventure is all about. We want to live in these cities and not just be here to check off another country and see the top tourist spots. Hanoi has beautiful temples, unique French-style architecture, and educational history museums that I could go on and on about as well.  But, our favorite part of Vietnam was just going about our daily routine and experiencing what living in Hanoi is all about. We were even fortunate enough to be here during the biggest holiday of the year, TET (lunar New Year).  We loved strolling the streets to see all the stands selling decorations and watching scooters fly by carrying giant kumquat or peach trees. 

On the first day of the Lunar New Year, we strolled around Hoan Kiem Lake in the Old Quarter as families, dressed in their bright, colorful, and matching holiday outfits, gathered for pictures while children played in the squares and enjoyed ice cream. 

Hanoi may not have blown us away with the most beautiful temples or the best food on our journey so far, but we had an unforgettable experience living here and an amazing opportunity to learn from a unique culture very different from our own.

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